Thursday, September 9, 2010

Introspective and Extrospective

So, when you discover what the root of your problems are, isn't it logical to pull up the root and get rid of it? What do you do when you realize that People are the root? Just plain old human nature? Sometimes they're well-intentioned and caring, but other times just thoughtless, self-serving, or even mean-spirited. You can't just root up humans and get rid of them, can you? When an old friend ignores you for a newer one, or when gossip is thoughtlessly spread, and it comes back full circle--can't you just retreat into yourself and away from society, and dispense with the whole mess altogether? Declare yourself to be neutral and isolated? Why can't you be a human Switzerland? Self-sufficient. Why did God make us to need other people? It would be so much easier to be a lone survivalist in the wilderness.

And what about when you realize, suddenly, shockingly, that you're a People too? That you, yes, YOU, as an individual, to the core, are not just an individual, but a part of the group, the People, and as such, you are also sometimes well-intentioned and caring, but also thoughtless, self-serving, or even, yes, even mean-spirited? You don't necessarily mean to be, but sometimes you just are. Because believe it or not, YOU are a flawed human being too.

What's the solution to the problem then?

You can try to be better, but you know you're gonna fuck up again, and everyone else is going to fuck up again, and again, and again. No matter how many times they/we/I get it right, it's also gonna go wrong. Does that give us enough reason to stop trying not to fuck up, at least too badly?

I know the answer to that last question, at least.

But sometimes you just really want to stop trying, and just go be a hermit, where no one is going to hurt you, and you can't hurt anyone else.